Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Happy Joe

Recently, I have been experiencing a unique surprise. This is a feeling inside of true heartfelt joy. It is the joy that I sense in being a part of life. It is the joy that I have of being alive. I call this feeling the emergence of "Happy Joe."

It is odd for me to say "Happy Joe." It is actually a bit uncomfortable, but the feeling inside is real. I recognize the feeling inside. It is like a glowing smile that warms and sparkles. I have not had too many real experiences like this in my lifetime, but the experiences that I have had were truly amazing.

In truth, I have devoted my life to going into heavier places. On many levels, this was my choice. I wanted to understand and fix all that hurt in life.

Somewhere along the way, on my journey through the deep and the heavy, I see that "Happy Joe" was never really given the chance to come to life.  I set him aside. I lost him a long while back.

Last summer, as my mom passed, I faced my greatest fear: I lost the person that knew the real me.  Today, I see that through my relationship with my mom, I was the aspects that she knew I had inside. In loving my mom, I became the qualities that she saw in me. Through my relationship with my mom, I accepted and welcomed into consciousness "Compassion Joe," "Courage Joe," "Grace Joe," and "Unconditional Love Joe."

After my mom's passing, she visited me in spirit form with a powerful statement and one powerful wish. She told me our relationship was not over and that her greatest wish was for me to love life again. My heart was filled with warmth, as I connected with her, but I told her that I did not think I could give her the wish. I did not think it was possible. I was aware of my compassion, my grace, my wisdom, and my love. Spending so much of my life focused on suffering had brought these aspects of me to life, but I stopped believing in "Happy Joe" a long time ago.

It has been some time since my mom's passing.  Unexpectedly, I have been noticing the happiness in those around me.  I am in awe of my girlfriend and the level of joy she radiates. And I have seen a side of my dad that is beyond explanation. At 80 years old, he has turned off the television, begun rollerblading in the mornings, playing in the gym a few hours in the mid-morning, ballroom dancing a few hours each afternoon, and he has begun going out on play dates in the evenings to the movies, casinos, concerts, and more.

What is this happiness coming alive around me? Is it time for me to accept it? I can feel the support by those around me. And of course, my mom is with me, along with many other angels and guides helping from the spirit realm.

It is a hard for me to believe, but it is true: "Happy Joe" is beginning to awaken. I am starting to feel the joy.

In my life, I have been driven to understand the depth of human pain and suffering. Along the way, I have been blessed to experience compassion, courage, grace, and unconditional love. Now unexpectedly, I am seeing the opportunity to embrace a part of me that was lost.

Welcome back "Happy Joe."

Welcome home.

- Joe Hurley

Edited from my winter 2007 newsletter.

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